"Peht"

Spicy(Peht) is a highly subjective thing in Thailand, I am finding. I consider myself at least reasonably well tempered against spices. I can easily eat anything they would dare create in a Thai or Indian restaurant in America for someone who asked to have it made "spicy"
Here, it's hit or miss, and I find that Thais have a great variety of concern for me and my Farang tongue. Just tonight, was hastily brought a meal without fuss that caused me great concern, drinking several glasses of water, marked by the occasional full green chili pepper found within the fearsome plate.
Later in the evening, I found myself the customer of a wary and reluctant Thai woman who insisted that it was spicy, in Thai, and made several hand motions to ensure that I knew what I was getting myself into. I bought it, fearfully, and took a bite of the strange creation ( a kind of crepe folded into a cone with the "spicy" filling. The first bite was harmless, the danger must be at the bottom I thought.
I was able to eat the entire thing, never once detecting that pepper of any kind was even an ingredient. Perhaps my tongue had been tempered by its earlier experience? Certainly, though, this was nowhere near as spicy. The variation makes ordering food very difficult.
Do I want it spicy? Yes. Very spicy? I don't know... what is very spicy for you? Will you tone it down for me even if I say very spicy? Will you absentmindedly produce a maelstrom of fire without even asking if I want it spicy?
So far, I haven't had anything I can't eat, or even didn't enjoy on one level or another, but I thought I would share.